Man In Black 3 Review

'If ITV had made 'Dr Who', it would look something like this...'

Erratic Tex-Mex man-love for Josh Brolin notwithstanding, ERH proceeds to get unnecessarily hot under the starched collar over the out of date, out of ideas and thoroughly out if time threequel to the sheer perfection that was the original Men in Black for Little White Lies...

The Avengers Review

'Like being kicked repeatedly in the throat by a metal dog...'

They don't come much bigger and they don't get all that very much better than Joss Whedon's bright, shiny, unapologetically fun superhero smackdown, The Avengers/Avengers Assemble. Click through for our lengthy, somewhat smitten review of Marvel's sprightly leviathan for Little White Lies...

Connery and Moore appear as Richard Nixon's Spitting Image puppet and Pat Butcher/a rotting orange respectively in Time Out's 1983 homage to Radio Times cover art.

Just imagine what they'd have done with Daniel Craig's mug - a visage ERH has always thought looked like a cross between a fleshy upturned plug and a dented coal scuttle.

Animation: The Eagleman Stag

An assured, delicately monochromatic creation in folded card and plasterboard, Mikey Please's The Eagleman Stag is a grudgingly humanistic mix of memory, aging and mutant beetle DNA, and will likely be one of the greatest things you’ll see on any screen this year...  

-

 

Rewind: Joysticks (1983)

The kids are funning it up and City Hall wants to drop the curtain on their good times. We’ve heared this song before, but Joysticks is a lament, not a hymn...

Film File: The Deer Hunter (1978)

Just. How. Cool. Is. This? Michelangelo goes Cimino in this brilliant, bonkers Deer Hunter Time Out cover from Feb, 1979.

Click through for a precise dissection of the film.

Satin Crew Jacket Heaven

The ERH Fashion Desk is a much maligned section of our vast sprawling organ, but even a blind squirrel finds the odd nut, and they've stumbled across a real blinder in the net's premier resource for Vintage TV and Film Crew Jackets.


Standouts are an unglued drug-busting cartoon on this silver 'Miami Vice' number, a ghoulish burgundy 'Night Court' jacket and this cooler-than-school 'Baretta' windbreak. But ERH's favourite has to be this slick, hi-tech, midnight black street-tough jacket knocked out to accompany warm, fuzzy MASH spin-off 'Trapper John M.D.'

ERH is now heading over to ebay with the housekeeping money and the sad, pitiful illusion that our ungainly bucket-gut and curiously misshapen frames could ever actually pull one of these babies off. See you there!

Rewind: Eat The Rich (1987)

The nobs are snubbing the snobs and the peasants are truly revolting in The Comic Strip's 1987 jollity pogrom!

Jerry Seinfeld's Video Shelf: Revealed!

Ever wondered what movies made up the motley collection of video tapes in the corner of Jerry Seinfeld's apartment? Well, now, after much educated guesswork, plenty of wild hypotheses and a many a crazed conjecture, ERH has the evidence that will finally lay the matter to rest once and for all. Our archivists have been granted unprecedented access to a recent find made in the Columbia Studios vault that puts an end to years of speculation, violent disagreement and bitter schisms within the fan community. The truth is here at last...

DO NOT TO BE CONFUSED WITH...

It’s a celluloid jungle out there. We’ve all of us at one point got our wires crossed and settled down for a night in front of the box with Ingrid Bergman and Cary Grant in Hitchcock’s peerless spy caper Notorious only to be confronted with workaday Biggie Smalls biopic… Notorious. Even the most diligent film fan can often find it tricky to differentiate between the deluge of similarly titled claptrap out there, but here are a few that you most definitely don’t want to mix and match…

Photo Archive: Lemon Popsicle (1977)

From back in the days when film mags weren't afraid to emblazon their covers with Jewish jailbait comes this... notable... issue of much-beloved but long-defunct mag 'Films and Filming' - the weird uncle of UK film magazines - featuring a couple of horny Hebrews from the excellent Lemon Popsicle (think Mean Streets meets Porky's in suburban Tel Aviv).

ERH found this copy mixed in with a pile of vintage bongo on a railway siding, but more can be found here. 'F+F-ing' mag cover policy would seem to have been to choose images on a dare after nine pints of wallop in The Coach and Horses of a Friday lunchtime. Try, for example, clicking on 1978 and scrolling down to #285 for an even more alarming cover that sees Bud Cort posing as 'Willy, Hitler's Son' and sporting an itty-bitty spider as a moustache!

Photo Archive: Buffalo Bill and the Indians (1976)

ERH can take or leave Robert Altman. Save for the peerless McCabe & Mrs. Miller, his films are a fairly mixed bunch of smug nonsense (M*A*S*H, O.C. and Stiggs), top-heavy actoring (Short Cuts, Gosford Park) and just plain screwy (Popeye, Brewster McCloud). Some hit, many miss, but all of Altman's patchiest aspects were gathered together for the total mess that was 1976's Buffalo Bill and the Indians, or Sitting Bull's History Lesson, a film that never outruns it's stage origins and slowly settles into a drunken - and very lengthy - shouting match between Paul Newman and any luckless bastard unfortunate enough to wander across his sight-line.

Rant over, we cannot deny that the film gifted us these fine, somewhat Dylanesque, production stills, some of which - such as the above - make it look as if someone had spiked the lunch wagon burritos with a heavy peyote garnish.

Click through for more...

VHS Heroes: Michael Douglas

Hollywood Stooge or Inside Man? The ERHQ Star Chamber reconsiders the career of the movie star that divides audiences deeper than a sportive pair...

RGB: Stone Trek

ERH has got to get organisised: entire star clusters of internet goodness are birthing and dying before we've had a chance to be high-handed and snarky about them! Luckily we've just about caught the comet tails of this web-nugget that takes two of the ERH Coaxial Desk's favourite things - intergalactic bri-nylon Sixties derring-doer 'Star Trek' and Paleolithic 'Simpsons' forbear 'The Flintstones' - and mashes them up into chunks of legally dubious space-rock starring Leonard Alloy (?) as Mr. Spock and William Shatrock (!) as priapic boy-scout Jim Kirk. Set Phasers for stoned!

See more here...

RGB: Muppet Seinfeld Babies

"You've got your Muppet Babies all over my Seinfeld!"

There's very little you can add to that...

Rewind: Krull (1983)

 About as enjoyable as a naked donkey ride to hell - in a sandpaper saddle...